Thursday, February 28, 2008

The Britney Economy and the Real Story:

(Originally posted by Jill on Feb 7, 2008)

I can't believe that I am writing about... Britney Spears. In fact, I never think about her at all. Whenever there is any news item on her, I automatically bypass it. . I think it is the biggest waste of news space ever. It's not that I am too snobby for tabloid scintillation. I admit I have watched the video of Amy Winehouse on the pipe-but I think she is a real talent - thus, I guess, worthy of the youtube hits. Let's me just reiterate and say that ... I don't give a f#&k about Britney Spears.

That being said, I was fascinated be by the recent report on NPR. Britney, herself, still rakes in around $9 million a year. But according to Portfolio magazine, it is "chicken feed compared with the overall Britney economy."

It estimated that a single photo of her can go for up to $100,000 or more - the exclusive bald pictures went for around $500, 000. They calculated that she makes up 20 percent of the paparazzi biz.

Britney was on the cover of the tabloids (US, People, OK!, etc.) 175 times in just 78 weeks. She has also topped the most searched on our Yahoo for six of the last seven years (I still don't get it).

The article concludes by saying the estimated Britney Economy is $110 to $120 million. Dang!

This all got me thinking: Is she a drug addict, bi-polar, or crazy like a fox? Here is my sick fantasy:

The Real Britney

Britney has finally been able to get past the camera flashes to open the front door of her Beverly Hills mansion. But not before she has randomly picked, out of the hordes, a euro-trashed looking Paparazzi named Mario to come inside with her. The door is closed. The media is all abuzz.

Britney: God, Larry that was just awful, wasn't it? Now whose move was it?

(they are in the middle of a serious chess match)

Larry, aka. Mario: How about before we do, I get an audio tape of you, with maybe a Ukrainian accent, acting insane again? That would be good for another $400,000, No?

Britney: A scathingly brilliant idea. Well let's get it over with as I do have a deadline for the Obama speech.

Larry: How is your book on String Theory going?

Britney: Checkmate!

The End

"Fame is proof that the people are gullible."
Ralph Waldo Emerson

A provocateurs quiz: Who said (and in what movie) "A Scathingly Brilliant Idea"?

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